I just had an interesting - and frustrating - experience trying to buy some shirts on sale at the website of a high end clothier on Saturday. Interesting because it illustrated how companies that spend a lot of money and creative horsepower building a brand, don’t seem to spend money on hiring and training people who support their brand efforts.

I won’t bore you with the web frustrations. Just suffice it to say their ordering process was not exactly user-friendly, and the advertised discount didn’t register on the order, so my confirmation shows I paid full price, and that my gift cards weren’t counted, etc. etc. – not exactly the kind of customer experience that brings them back for more.

When I called customer service, and explained what happened, the CSR confirmed, yes, it hadn’t gone through correctly and that someone would call me back on Monday.

So much for the ease of buying online.

What was striking to me was the effort, money, and years this company has spent in creating a classy image and yet they don’t hire people who get it that if the customer is inconvenienced, basic courtesy says you respond with:

“I’m sorry for the inconvenience” and you say it with sincerity.

I would think that the majority of their customers are of the “old school” of proper etiquette and would be especially desiring of courtesy, so to have this kind of response was surprising.

When I got home on Monday and got their message to call back and did, I reached a different person, a man with a stern, not terribly inviting, voice. I told him I had received a message from Tara (not her real name) and was returning her call.

“Hold on one second” was his response.

No “Please…” or “Could you hold on…”

Just a direct order to hold on…

“What is it with these people!” I’m thinking. You would think that Brooks Brothers would be like the Ritz Carlton of retail and only hire people who have a high degree of class and manners.

Oh, and then, when I checked with “Tara” to see if the $10 discount they advertised had been applied – Nope!.

Again… no “Sorry for the inconvenience”, no indication that the whole process should have been an embarrassment to her and her employer. (there was even more to this, but I didn’t want to bog you down in all the details).

OK, enough of the rant… I share this with you to heighten your awareness of how your people might be representing you.

Are you hiring people with manners?

Are you coaching your CSRs?

Are you mystery shopping your business?

If not, you might be spending a lot of money building a brand, while your staff is damaging it.

I had an experience moments ago with Staples that reminded me of the number one source of customer defection (and anger) – Being Treated With an Attitude of Indifference.

According to the famous customer defection research done by TARP, the #1 reason for customers leaving – in fact nothing came even close to it – was being treated with indifference.

Customer service reps show indifference by:

1. Not apologizing for mistakes

2. Chatting with colleagues while the customer waits

3. Not acknowledging the customer’s distress (e.g. not saying things like “I can understand why you’re so frustrated.”)

4. Not bothering to do research to find an answer or giving up after a weak try

5. Not following up when they say they will

It was interesting with my Staples interaction because the first person showed concern while the second didn’t. So, while one person built their reputation, the other diminished it.

Here’s what happened…

I emailed a file to be printed and asked for a confirmation email, so I knew they had received it. When none arrived, I called this morning to check. When I explained to the woman on the phone that I hadn’t gotten a confirmation as I had requested, which made me wonder if it hadn’t arrived, she said “Oh sorry, let me check.”

Perfect. As a customer, I get it that she cares. Even though at this point, we don’t know if them not sending a confirmation was a mistake or was because they never got the email, she indicates concern over my having to follow up.

Classic, gracious, concerned customer service…

I hear in the background a young man saying that he did get the email. I asked to talk with him and said that I had requested a confirmation and if he could do that in the future I would appreciate it.

“No problem” was his response in a cool, matter of fact way. No “Sorry I forgot” or “Sorry about that”.

No indication that he cares about having dropped the ball.

While that’s a little thing compared to some of the more outrageous examples of customer service indifference we have all experienced, it’s a good example of how indifference can leave a sour taste in the mouth of a customer and offset the good experiences other employees create.

So… make sure you:

1) hire people who care about service, care about helping people, and demonstrate empathy

2) keep it fresh in your customer service rep’s minds about what it’s like from the customer’s side of the interaction, including being inconvenienced

3) remind them to acknowledge and apologize when customers are inconvenienced or they make a mistake

4) if they don’t think it’s important, they’re costing you in terms of customer loyalty, so don’t let that go unaddressed

One final thing... as I'm sure you know (but it's worth being reminded) the more you model concern for your customer service people, the more they "get it".

By the way, the power of showing you care about your employees cannot be overstated. Here's what former Gallup research Marcus Buckingham said about the impact of caring:

“I’d like to replace this skill (managers caring for their employees) with one that is more hard-edged, more tangible, but there’s no getting around the data. A multiple of research studies confirm that employees are more productive when they feel that someone at work cares about them.”

“Employees who feel cared about are less likely to miss work, less likely to have accidents, less likely to file workers compensation claims, less likely to steal, less likely to quit, more likely to recommend the company to friends and family.”

Marcus Buckingham in “The One Thing You Need to Know: ... About Great Managing, Great Leading, and Sustained Individual Success”

Emotional Management is one of the components of Emotional Intelligence, which, research shows, accounts for 2/3 of career success, regardless of the profession.

Perhaps nowhere is this skill more important than in customer service. Anyone who has ever done customer service (or sales) knows exactly what I mean.

Do your customer service staff know how to stay "In the Zone" despite the pressures of their job? Do they know how to maintain their composure or do get easily rocked and go from being friendly to testy and sharp?

I had an interesting experience the other day that illustrated how a customer service professional’s ability to maintain her composure can make or break a customer service moment of truth.

I stopped into a Starbucks and ordered one of their iced drinks and asked for whipped cream on top. When the woman making the drink put the flat lid on top, as opposed to the domed “whipped cream cover” I asked her for the whipped cream.

“Oh, this doesn’t typically come with whipped cream. In the future, let the person taking your order know you want it” she said in a neutral-to-friendly tone of voice.

“Actually, I did ask for it” I replied in a cheery voice.

“Yes, I told you he wanted whipped cream” piped up the woman who took my order.

Again, she too made her comment, not in an antagonistic or “gotcha” tone, but in a cheerful “Did that!” manner.

“Oh, well it’s hard to hear everything when I’m taking the drive through orders too” huffed the woman making the drink, as she tensed up.

She took the lid off, squirted the whipped cream on top, put the new lid on and handed it to me, never making contact, her face set in a hard expression.

Ever curious, I would have loved to ask her why she was upset. I would have loved to understand what happened inside of her for a little mistake to suddenly sour her mood.

At the risk of stating the obvious, it didn’t exactly seem like an appropriate question to ask.

But I still would have loved to have known what happened in her head.

Did she feel embarrassed that she made a mistake – even though no one was making a big deal about it, and even though it was a trivial mistake?

Did she simply not like being wrong, even over something inconsequential?

Regardless of the reason, her reaction is a good example of why it’s so important for people in the service field to develop effective emotional management skills, so they can maintain their grace and composure and not get easily rattled.

In this situation, her awkwardness translated into a sudden sullen aloofness that created an awkward customer experience – hardly the experience you want your staff to create.

Contrast this with another Starbucks – this one in NYC. They had an incredibly long line of caffeine craving, gotta-go New Yorkers. As I waited in line, I found myself absolutely mesmerized by the woman behind the counter.

She moved at breakneck speed, called out drink orders, made change, and hustled people along in a calm, friendly, yet uber-efficient way, and NEVER spoke in a rushed, harsh, or tense voice.

When it was my turn, she even called me “Honey.”

She was the Michael Jordan of service professionals – unbelievably skilled and as cool as can be under pressure.

So… do you teach your team emotional management skills?

Do you teach them how to recover if they’re upset?

…How to stay grounded so they’re less likely to be rocked by difficult customers and pressured situations?

If you teach your people these skills, if you teach them how to become more resilient, they’ll pay you back in being able to provide gracious, friendly service despite the pressure and demands of their incredibly emotionally demanding jobs.

The smart way to develop stress management/resilience skills

Oh by the way.... if you have office staff or call center staff who would like to reduce their stress level and increase their ability to be in "the Productive Zone", check out Optimal Office. They approached me about collaborating on a way to deliver "just in time" stress reduction/resilience enhancing "micro-trainings". As soon as they described what they were onto, I thought "This is the way training is supposed to be done, in bite sized chunks and when people need it."

It's a great way to develop these skills without going to a weekend retreat. So check them out.

Also, I'll soon be having some downloadable MP3 "training minutes" on different stress management/resilience enhancement techniques.

Also, also, if you want a copy of my CD "Beat Stress To Be At Your Best" email me at David@HumanNatureAtWork.com