From both my experience as a customer and as a service consultant, I believe a lot of what gets labeled as “difficult customer behavior” by service professionals is really a natural reaction to abrupt, tacky, or disinterested behavior by the service person.

Let me give you an example:

I flew out of Manchester Airport a few weeks ago and parked in one of the satellite parking lots and proceeded to one of the shuttle “shelters”. Since this was the first time I’ve flown out of Manchester, I wasn’t sure about how the shuttle service worked. After a few minutes, I saw a shuttle bus pull into the far end of either my lot or the next one, and then pull out and head toward the airport. The driver waved to me some kind of signal, which I couldn’t translate.

Seeing the ticket booth not far away, I walked over to find out how it works and to make sure I was in the right place. I approached the window, and before I could say a word, and an older woman, reading a paper, slid open the window and barked out “The shuttle comes every 7-10 minutes” in a scolding tone of voice.

“Great… just wanted to make sure I was in the right place” I replied turning to go, not wanting to prolong any conversation with this grump.

She wasn’t through, though. As I walked away, I could hear her rattling off a lecture about how one should leave enough time to catch the shuttle if they are going to use the parking lot.

Now, even though I didn’t get into an argument with her or give her a hard time, I could easily see this woman’s behavior triggering hostile or smart aleck responses from the public she’s supposed to be serving. I’m also sure she would have no clue about how she was creating the negative customer behaviors that have left her so jaded.

To put this into action:

1. Pay attention to how you greet customers, especially if you primarily work over the phone. It’s especially easy to get into a disinterested, auto-pilot mode if your answering call after call. Are you making them feel welcome or like just another number?

2. Ask yourself if you make it comfortable for customers to ask questions. Does your voice tone and word choice convey “There are no dumb questions” or does it communicate “I can’t believe you’re asking me this… what are you, an idiot?”

3. To help yourself develop greater patience with what you might see as customer cluelessness, remember, customers aren’t supposed to be as familiar with your system as you are. Rules, procedures, and directions that are obvious to someone working with them many times a day are not so self-evident to the first-timer.

4. Ask yourself: “How do I act when I’m a customer and feel a bit insecure and unsure of myself because it’s all new territory for me?” (If you’re not sure, think healthcare system, legal system, or car repair). Ask yourself: “How do I want to be treated when I’m in this type of situation?”

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